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INTERNET INSANITY

Lorraine,

Putting up this website and trying to figure out all the computer language, dealing with computer glitzes, ftp addresses and a computer foreign language that will take me years to learn is driving me to INSANITY!!

You know what the definition of insanity is don’t you? Doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results!

I’m trying to have my computer and the Internet become close friends and allies. It’s not working—in the past couple of months, my hard drive has crashed TWICE, wireless disappeared, and I cracked my screen (remember when I was talking to you and trying to carry too much stuff with one hand).

I love my computer but I’m feeling like a jilted lover.

Uploads, downloads, bumped off the Internet, material lost, symbols appearing out of nowhere—HOW DOES ANYONE FIGURE THIS OUT?

You need a frigging PH.D. in Computer Science to send an e-mail.

I need some Valium.

Mary

Mary,

Forget the PH.D. in computer science, not only would we be graduating about the time that we are checking into the assisted-living facility, our brain capacity for retention is now out-of-order and totally defunked. Our heads now need to come complete with a “default” button that one would push to bring our VERY gray matter back to “original set-up-mode”, then and only then could we walk away with real knowledge of a mainframe.
After trying to figure out why my laptop wouldn’t connect to the internet I had the same frustrating and exasperating experiences, this time with simple words.

Why do computer techs who are working with you, over the phone, to fix or diagnose a problem use terms like “power down your computer” instead of the only one I understand which is “shut it off”.

Or, “disconnect from the electrical connection”, instead of the easy “unplug”.

Due to the many days of not being able to connect to the internet and intercept my incoming mail, I had an enormous amount of unread emails. Upon hearing my complaint the tech told me I should consider claiming E-MAIL BANKRUPTCY. I thought maybe he had morphed into a banker but he went on to explain that when there are too many unread emails to open and read, one can paste an apologetic message regarding the lack of response to said email, attach all addresses, hit send and everyone reads of your plight and internet forgiveness is granted. You were not being rude, you just had no ACCESS. This must now be considered a form of internet manners.

I like my idea better. I asked the tech if this was a possibility……you just DELETE all, since the majority of them are garbage and if they need to get back to you, they will!! He had no response.

Internet techies with no sense of humor…too bad cause these situations are just begging for a laugh.

Lorraine

This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 22nd, 2007 at 3:09 pm and is filed under Technology Gone Amok, Daily Blog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.