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Lorraine,

Awhile back on The View, one of the HOT TOPICS was ARMPITS. Yes, you heard me… ARMPITS. Apparently, this is the latest national obsession besides Lindsey Lohan’s 12th rehab and Britney Spears recent VH-1 awards debacle. LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!!!! LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!!! SOB SOB! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZAr9E8i3ng).

Apparently, Beyonce was exposing her armpits while on a photo shoot. This was met with huge gasps of horror and displeasure by the media and the public.

Then, the View showed a picture of Julia Roberts taken years ago where she raised her arm in a wave exposing underarm hair that Joy cleverly called a picture of Osama Bin Laden (Lorraine, trust me…you had to see this picture because between the hair and the shadow of Julia’s underarm…it did look like an exact replica of Osama Bin Laden!).

ARMPITS are the last things in the world I want to worry about. And, WHY is this a HOT TOPIC? Are we so shallow as women that this is now a top priority cosmetic issue?

Let’s face it. Nora Ephron wrote a book about hating her neck…maybe we should write a book about hating our armpits because now that I think about it, I’ve never liked armpits, my own or others (except for my husband’s but that’s a different story). And I’ve noticed lately that my armpits have suddenly become fat deposit containers that go from my armpit to my underarm.

If Beyonce is showing her armpits and the 40’s are the new 20’s, I need to get with it and start exposing them ASAP. Hell, I might even try to make an art form out of it.

Mary